Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D.

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

 

This is how it develops:

 

I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose, I look over at my car and decide my car needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice that here is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mailbox earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

 

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox, when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

 

I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

 

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.  As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote someone left on the kitchen table.

 

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.  I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.  Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

 

At the end of the day:

-the car isn't washed,-the bills aren't paid, -there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter, ----the flowers don't have enough water, ----there is still only 1 check in my check book, ----I can't find the remote, ----I can't find my glasses, ----and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.  Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired.  I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.

 

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!

 

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC.

P.S I just remembered. I LEFT THE WATER RUNNING IN THE DRIVEWAY!